


Five Times the TARDIS Tried to Play Matchmaker and One Time It Didn't Have To

by MaddeningNoise



Category: Doctor Who, Sherlock (TV), wholock - Fandom
Genre: 5+1 Things, First Kiss, John and Sherlock haven't caught up, Johnlock - Freeform, M/M, So the TARDIS plays matchmaker, TARDIS - Freeform, The Doctor ships it, The TARDIS ships it, Wholock, everyone ships it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-05
Updated: 2015-02-05
Packaged: 2018-03-10 16:15:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3296705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaddeningNoise/pseuds/MaddeningNoise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John and Sherlock are traveling with the Doctor. The TARDIS ships Johnlock and decides to do something about it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Times the TARDIS Tried to Play Matchmaker and One Time It Didn't Have To

 The first time it happens, it's very nearly amusing. John and Sherlock have been traveling in the TARDIS for a little less than two days, and the TARDIS decides they've been there long enough to have their own bedrooms. John and Sherlock are passing through the hall, on their way to explore the TARDIS at sherlocks insistence, when  
John notices that a new, very familiar black door now sits just across the hall from The Doctor's, complete with the golden 221b numbering and the lopsided door knocker.

 John stops and calls out Sherlock's name, the younger man returning to where John stands looking peeved he hadn't noticed it himself. John can't blame him; Sherlock hasn't quite gotten used to the rules of this world, where new rooms can be generated at a moment's notice and statues can move. They enter, discovering their sitting room just as they had left it, Sherlock's violin and skull located in their usual spots, John's chair looking just as worn as usual. It takes a moment for John to realize  
that the stairs to his room don't and can't and don't exist without a hall, and Sherlock has already swept down the hall to inspect his own room. After a good ten minutes of looking around with a disbelieving air, John drops by Sherlocks room, hoping for twin beds, but discovering Sherlock's usual bed, and thinking that he should have known. If every living being on earth is going to think they're a couple, why not sentient but not quite living beings as well? He very nearly chuckles  
at the thought, but as Sherlock begins to suggest something about sharing a bed, John contemplates throwing a pillow at him, just to take out his frustration. He grabs sheets from Sherlock's closet and makes his way back down the hall to the couch, grumbling all the way.

The second time it happens, John very nearly breaks his foot. The Doctor has told them to grab something "wibbly-wobbly-techy-wechy" from a "rather large" storage closet at the end of the hall. Sherlock opens the door and enters before John, and as John follows behind him and closes the door, intending to help search for the vaguely described object in question, he finds himself chest to chest with Sherlock in a space he had definitely seen to be expansive moments before. He stares at Sherlock (whose eyes are doing that analytical thing John hates when he is the subject) for a second before reaching for the door handle and finding it locked. He manages to turn around and tries the door more vigorously before realizing he is now in just as unfortunate a situation as before when it comes to his proximity with Sherlock, and somehow managing to kick the door and Sherlock's shin in the tight space they are in. A sharp pain goes through his foot, and the room expands at the sound of the Doctor's approaching voice, complaining about the time they are wasting and will they please just stop the shenanigans and get out of the storage  
closet. John very nearly kicks something again.

The third time it happens, John's back already aches from the long nights on the couch, and he very nearly breaks the nearest part of the TARDIS control board. Sherlock is leaning against the control panel, watching the Doctor flit this way and that, logic somehow masked by the madness of his levers and buttons and totally unnecessary bow tie straightens. He's doubtlessly trying to figure out how it works, though John isn't entirely convinced the TARDIS isn't on autopilot all the time and the Doctor isn't just showing off. As they land on a totally new planet, which the Doctor promises to be full of fascinating people and marvelous things, the TARDIS makes a sudden  
jerky movement, and John stumbles forward to be caught by Sherlock as the detective and Doctor recoil and steady themselves against the control board. After an awkward moment of silence in which Sherlock continues to grasp Johns arms and the two stare at each other insilence, eyes locked, the Doctor continues going on about the planet they have just landed on and how it manufactures others planets but went out of business years ago. John breaks away from Sherlock and  
slaps the control board angrily when the Doctor's back is turned, hand landing on a green button and causing quite a bit of chaos.

The fourth time it happens, John breaks a mug. The TARDIS has taken to leaving tea for them in the mornings, usually in mugs they already own, but today John wakes up to a pair of navy blue mugs that read "his"and "his" on them, and has a little white heart printed on the bottom of the inside of the cup. John, too tired  
to notice the outside of the cup, spots the heart with the word "detective" inside it and spews tea all over the place, dropping the  
mug and consequentially shattering it. The lights in their kitchen flicker, and John would bet everything he owns it's the TARDIS laughing at him.

The fifth time it happens, John can't say he minds all that much. The fifth time is several weeks after the TARDIS last hinted at them, and with after so much time around a very grouchy and case-less sherlock, John is just as delighted as Sherlock is when the TARDIS adds a mock-crime-scene into the mix, complete with the lab where they first met. As Sherlock races down the halls with John following close behind, john can't help but smile affectionately as Sherlock solves the mock-case in a solid four hours. Doubtlessly, Sherlock would be less interested in a mock-case if it wasn't generated by alien tech, and part of the delight for Sherlock is spending a good hour in the lab trying to figure out how the TARDIS had done it. John grins as Sherlock leans over his microscope muttering about how alien tech is  
amazing and he might steal some and take it back with him.

The last time the TARDIS plays matchmaker, she doesn't actually do anything. The Doctor has already retired to bed, and Sherlock and John are cautiously sitting in the TARDIS with their feet hanging out into space, marveling at the size of it all and John making the occasional jab about how the solar system is oh so interesting now, when Sherlock abruptly sets down his mug of tea and leans over to kiss John. John drops his mug, or would have if gravity was a factor in space, and leans over to kiss Sherlock back as his mug floats lazily beside them. The lights in the TARDIS dim to a wistful glow as John threads his hand through Sherlock's hair and Sherlock deepens the kiss. There's no funny business that night, but John doesn't sleep on the couch either.


End file.
